Archive for the ‘Random wifflings’ Category

Carpet bombing Goodreads

Posted: November 24, 2015 in Random wifflings

I’ll be copying over the book reviews I have on this site to Goodreads over the next couple of weeks, because – completeness and sense of rightness and such. And I don’t know, I’m running around the diginetwebhellthing like a headless chicken composed of zeroes and ones because it’s the 21st century and I was born in the Stone Age. I’ve almost put all the surviving files I have from Death Ray up here, so it seems like the right time. Soon, I’ll start posting my later reviews done for other publications here and on the aforementioned site of good reading. Now won’t that be lovely for everyone?

If this stuff crops up a lot on your Twitter and Facebook feeds, now you know why. Hey, while we’re here, why don’t you check out my Goodreads page? You may be surprised how many books I’ve written. I know I am. I wrote most of them in a post-baby haze, driven by a need for escape and cold hard cash. Who knows how many words ran from my fingers along with the tears of hysteria flooding from my eyes? Does this business warp you, or do you have to be warped to do it? That’s the kind of question I ask myself ALL THE TIME, when I’m not fending off hordes of imaginary goblins. Help.

I probably take more pictures of natural sights in autumn at any other time. We have some exciting weather around Hebden Bridge during the season, with conditions that range from the summery to the wintery and everything in between. It is often stormy. Provided I’m dressed appropriately, there’s little I find more invigorating than being on my own in the middle of nowhere, being blasted by freezing wind and rain. That I enjoy it is fortunate, because by any sane man’s definition Yorkshire’s climate is awful.

Here are a few pictures of weathery stuff, and a bonus deer.


Season’s first snow, Saturday 21st November, 2015.


Leaves stacked like Pringles by flooding, Friday 20th November, 2015.


The River Calder in full spate. The usual level is two metres lower than this. The picture was taken from my kitchen window. Luckily, it never floods where we live. Monday, 9th November 2015.


Roe stag against the sky. Now the leaves have fallen, it’s much easier to spot deer. Shortly before I saw this, Magnus and I started a group of three, and saw another trio some way off down the hill. Friday 20th November, 2015.

81FWmsjEISL._SL1500_Champion of Mars, still 99p/$1.53 on Kindle


I’ve been having some consultations with proper pro people about my online life. One thing that came up was me asking you to rate my books on Amazon and Goodreads. Really? You actually, really think I should ask that? Holy cow.

I haven’t done this very much because I’m British. The very thought of saying “Go! Go rate my books! Tell me how marvellous I am!” to people I’ve never looked in the eye over a teacup makes me shudder in my boots. It fills me with such a profound sense of shame I imagine slipping away from my life in the dead of night to join the Foreign Legion, leaving nothing but a poignant confessional on tear-stained notepaper. It’s just not the done thing.

But, you know what? To an extent sales are driven by ratings. Internet algorithms are. So I’m going to fight down the nausea and say, “If you enjoy my work, please take the time to rate it online.”

This is of course self-serving. Fundamentally it’s about my bank balance. But it’s not just about me (except it is. Shush now me!). It’s about you too. If you like my books and rate them, that encourages other folk to buy them. If people buy enough, my publishers are happy and I get to write more. So if you’ve wanted more Richards and Klein stories, or a sequel to Crash, or you want the Black Library to make me chief goblin wrangler, click a few star buttons. It’ll help.

God, I feel dirty now. Horribly dirty, and not in a good way. I need a lie down and some absinthe just to wash the taste from my mouth. I may be away a while.

Tomorrow is the great Facebook reorganisation! Keep in touch, like my official page.

81FWmsjEISL._SL1500_Champion of Mars, still 99p! Also on offer in America!

Facebooking changes

Posted: November 4, 2015 in Random wifflings

Greetings! I’ve some maybe slightly inconvenient news. I dunno. Is it inconvenient? We like everything to hold the promise of microwaveable, push-button, voice-activated convenience these days even if the tech is rarely what it’s cracked up to be.  (I’m thinking of you Cortana, installed on my Windows 10, you jumped up search engine you. Er, maybe when Cortana is actually useful, it’ll get offended. So, just in case – Cortana, if you ever read this and feel enough to be upset, you’ve won, and I apologise). In this case, you human people actually only have to press a button, a virtual one at that.

What the hell am I rambling about? This: It’s that time of year when things calm down (I’ve only one project to write at once) and I turn my attention half-heartedly to social media, which I feel I should be doing more on, but awfully neglect. Facebook is my current target. I’m going to follow many of my author colleagues and separate the personal from the professional, and have a massive… well, I don’t like to use the word cull, but cull.

If I know you well, you’ll stay on my friends list for my Guy Francis Haley page. If I don’t, I’m going to “unfriend” you. It’s nothing personal, although that horrible verbal neologism makes it sound so. I still love you for liking my books, and I still want to talk to you. You can do that over on my official Guy Haley Facebook page, or right here. If you “Like” the page, you’ll get notification of all my updates, random musings and pictures of toy soldiers posted on this blog and on twitter, only without the photographs of my blood kin (I mean my nephews, brothers and so forth. I’m not in a vampire coven, but “blood kin” sounds way cooler than “family”).

Remember I’m also on Twitter as @guyhaley, and on Goodreads.

I’ll be putting this into action on Friday. I’ll post some reminders on Twitter before then.

81FWmsjEISL._SL1500_Champion of Mars, still 99p!

This last Hallowe’en I had a fine time meeting up with a bunch of school friends. Three nights of heavy drinking inevitably took its toll, so after I collected Doctor Magnus from his dog hotel I headed up to the moors to blast out the cobwebs. It is freezing down in the valleys, and still very foggy. Up on the tops it’s glorious sunshine and stunning vistas over mist-choked valleys. Here’s a few pictures.


Mist in the Calder Valley and Cragg Vale. Often this is caused by a temperature inversion – warm, moisture laden air trying to rise meets a cap of cold air that prevents it from doing so and forces its moisture load to condense as fog. This foggy air then sits in place, even when the air above becomes warmer, as it did today. There was a three degree temperature difference between the valley bottom and the Tops. For once, it was warmer on the moors.


The sun filtered by a tree at the top of Cragg Vale.


Where the woods meet the moors at the top of Cragg Brook.

81FWmsjEISL._SL1500_Champion of Mars, still 99p!

Da return of Magteef!

Posted: September 12, 2015 in Gaming, Random wifflings
Tags: ,

He’s blue, he’s got a big gun, he’s a surprisingly accurate shot – Magteef the Mek is back in business!

Right, sure, all that means nothing to you, but something to me. Magteef was a mekboy in my second edition 40k army twenty-odd years ago. He was a renowned tinkerer and – being a Deathskull – pilferer of technological trinkets.


Old Magteef. His original gun is gone as I was going to reuse it, but it looked ridiculously old skool once attached to the new model so I made a new one. Also: back banners – so in fashion back then.

Last year, I decided to remake the old boy. I undercoated him and that was that. He got a rare outing in a recent game, where he helped bag an Eldar war walker. At the urging of my pal and opponent Ste, I gave him a lick of paint. Here he is.


New Magteef. The paint job’s not my best. I ran through the last of my Knarloc Green (the best orc shade ever) painting AoS Uruks, so I was forced to experiment with a new greenskin technique. It didn’t quite work out. Ah well.

Magteef is wearing a variety of tools from the original plastic battlewagon, released in the late 80s. On his back he sports a white metal welding torch scavenged from a 2000s Gorkamorka Spanner. His gun is a one million gigawatt kustom blasta made from a plastic big shoota and rokkit launcher. His head is a metal alternative from some kit or other, or it might be a plastic spare from the Lootas set, I honestly don’t remember. He is ably assisted by a vintage Grot (still available on the webstore) equipped with a bag full of oil squigs. For reasons best known to himself, Magteef’s bionic eye and blue face paint have switched sides. He is an Ork, so he probably forgot where they were supposed to be.

If you’ve ever read Skarsnik, Engine of Mork, Evil Sun Rising, or listened to the audio The Klaw of Mork, you’ll know that I love greenskins. I’ve never played a lot of connected games or campaigns, but I always used to name my prominent characters and build stories around them. As in this case, they’re stories that can persist for decades. That’s a huge part of the hobby for me, is it for you?